Building Genuine Relationships, pt 6

©2021 dan bulkley | ask@lifefellowship.org

section 1

It seems basic, but we often fool ourselves thinking that the opportunities afforded by: proximity proverbs 27:10, living with each other ii corinthians 7:3 i peter 3:7, meeting regularly hebrews 10:24-25 even daily acts 2:46, seeing each other ii john 1:12, thinking of each other i thessalonians 2:17, praying and giving thanks for each other ephesians 1:16 and contacting each other jude 1:3 is simply the fruit of relationships and not necessarily the sowing of genuine relationships. Mainly genuine relationships grow in the locality God has placed you ii corinthians 1:1. While not absolutely exclusive, it is emphasized in Scripture that through face-to-face interaction we are afforded the mutual building up of each other romans 1:10-12, as that is the purpose of the opportunity ephesians 5:15-16 of the time and place we have been assigned acts 17:26-27 acts 13:36. Even Christ Himself exemplified deeper, active compassion with those who He had actual literal, personal opportunity with matthew 9:36 mark 6:34.

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supporting scriptures

proverbs 27:10

Do not forsake your friend and your father’s friend, and do not go to your brother’s house in the day of your calamity.

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ii corinthians 7:3

I do not say this to condemn you, for I said before that you are in our hearts, to die together and to live together.

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i peter 3:7

Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

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hebrews 10:24-25

And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, 25 not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.

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acts 2:46

And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts,

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ii john 1:12

Though I have much to write to you, I would rather not use paper and ink. Instead I hope to come to you and talk face to face, so that our joy may be complete.

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i thessalonians 2:17

But since we were torn away from you, brothers, for a short time, in person not in heart, we endeavored the more eagerly and with great desire to see you face to face

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ephesians 1:16

I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers,

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jude 1:3

Beloved, although I was very eager to write to you about our common salvation, I found it necessary to write appealing to you to contend for the faith that was once for all delivered to the saints.

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ii corinthians 1:1

Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, and Timothy our brother,

To the church of God that is at Corinth, with all the saints who are in the whole of Achaia

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romans 1:10-12

always in my prayers, asking that somehow by God’s will I may now at last succeed in coming to you. 11 For I long to see you, that I may impart to you some spiritual gift to strengthen you— 12 that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other’s faith, both yours and mine.

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ephesians 5:15-16

Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.

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acts 17:26-27

And he made from one man every nation of mankind to live on all the face of the earth, having determined allotted periods and the boundaries of their dwelling place, 27 that they should seek God, and perhaps feel their way toward him and find him. Yet he is actually not far from each one of us,

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acts 13:36

For David, after he had served the purpose of God in his own generation, fell asleep and was laid with his fathers and saw corruption,

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matthew 9:36

When he saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.

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mark 6:34

When he went ashore he saw a great crowd, and he had compassion on them, because they were like sheep without a shepherd. And he began to teach them many things.

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section 2

As we have studied, this most certainly calls for living in harmony with those in your sphere of opportunity i peter 3:8, seasoning your interactions with the grace colossians 4:5-6 needed for the other’s need at the moment proverbs 15:23 ephesians 4:29; conducting yourself by God’s grace ii corinthians 1:12 and not your own wisdom proverbs 3:5-6 in sincerity and Truth i corinthians 5:8 so that together you may serve the Lord philippians 1:27 zephaniah 3:9.

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supporting scriptures

i peter 3:8

Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.

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colossians 4:5-6

Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time.

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proverbs 15:23

To make an apt answer is a joy to a man, and a word in season, how good it is!

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ephesians 4:29

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

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ii corinthians 1:12

For our boast is this, the testimony of our conscience, that we behaved in the world with simplicity and godly sincerity, not by earthly wisdom but by the grace of God, and supremely so toward you.

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proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.

6 In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

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i corinthians 5:8

Let us therefore celebrate the festival, not with the old leaven, the leaven of malice and evil, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.

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philippians 1:27

Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel

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zephaniah 3:9

"For at that time I will change the speech of the peoples to a pure speech, that all of them may call upon the name of the LORD and serve him with one accord.

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my notes:

section 3

The summary key to all these principles for building genuine relationships is the two-sided coin of Truth and Love. Where Truth is absent, Biblical Love cannot be present i corinthians 13:6 proverbs 26:28. Where Love is absent, full, Biblical Truth will only be distorted matthew 23:2-15 ephesians 4:15 acts 13:10. These two indispensably exist together, for God defines both Truth john 14:6 and Love i john 4:8 by Himself and He cannot deny Himself ii timothy 2:13. This is why it is imperative that we seek to be full of both Truth and Love.

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supporting scriptures

i corinthians 13:6

it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.

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proverbs 26:28

A lying tongue hates its victims, and a flattering mouth works ruin.

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my notes:

matthew 23:2-15

"The scribes and the Pharisees sit on Moses’ seat, 3 so do and observe whatever they tell you, but not the works they do. For they preach, but do not practice. 4 They tie up heavy burdens, hard to bear, and lay them on people’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to move them with their finger. 5 They do all their deeds to be seen by others. For they make their phylacteries broad and their fringes long, 6 and they love the place of honor at feasts and the best seats in the synagogues 7 and greetings in the marketplaces and being called rabbi by others. 8 But you are not to be called rabbi, for you have one teacher, and you are all brothers. 9 And call no man your father on earth, for you have one Father, who is in heaven. 10 Neither be called instructors, for you have one instructor, the Christ. 11 The greatest among you shall be your servant. 12 Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.

13 "But woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you shut the kingdom of heaven in people’s faces. For you neither enter yourselves nor allow those who would enter to go in. 15 Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you travel across sea and land to make a single proselyte, and when he becomes a proselyte, you make him twice as much a child of hell as yourselves.

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ephesians 4:15

Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ,

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acts 13:10

and said, "You son of the devil, you enemy of all righteousness, full of all deceit and villainy, will you not stop making crooked the straight paths of the Lord?

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john 14:6

Jesus said to him, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

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i john 4:8

Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.

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ii timothy 2:13

if we are faithless, he remains faithful—for he cannot deny himself.

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section 4

When one is sincerely truthful with another this leads to love proverbs 28:23 proverbs 27:5-6. When one is sincerely loving with another this leads to Truth ii corinthians 5:14 proverbs 18:16. So, we must strive to be Truthful and Loving like Christ ii john 1:1-6.

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supporting scriptures

proverbs 28:23

Whoever rebukes a man will afterward find more favor than he who flatters with his tongue.

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proverbs 27:5-6

Better is open rebuke than hidden love.

6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.

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ii corinthians 5:14

For the love of Christ controls us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore all have died

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proverbs 18:16

A man’s gift makes room for him and brings him before the great.

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ii john 1:1-6

The elder to the elect lady and her children, whom I love in truth, and not only I, but also all who know the truth, 2 because of the truth that abides in us and will be with us forever:

3 Grace, mercy, and peace will be with us, from God the Father and from Jesus Christ the Father’s Son, in truth and love.

4 I rejoiced greatly to find some of your children walking in the truth, just as we were commanded by the Father. 5 And now I ask you, dear lady—not as though I were writing you a new commandment, but the one we have had from the beginning—that we love one another. 6 And this is love, that we walk according to his commandments; this is the commandment, just as you have heard from the beginning, so that you should walk in it.

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section 5

Remember, in us Love is sincerely doing what God directs for the sake of others especially at the cost of one’s own self i john 5:2-3 i john 3:16. The Truth is God’s Word john 17:17 made alive in us as we are set free james 1:25 i peter 1:22 romans 8:21 from our selfish aspirations romans 6:16-23 and the discouragement of circumstances ii corinthians 4:16-18 ii corinthians 5:7 matthew 14:29-31 with an ever-growing liberty john 8:32 psalm 119:45 to serve the Lord and others galatians 5:1 galatians 5:13.

my notes:

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supporting scriptures

i john 5:2-3

By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. 3 For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome.

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i john 3:16

By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers.

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john 17:17

Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth.

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james 1:25

But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.

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i peter 1:22

Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart,

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romans 8:21

that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God.

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romans 6:16-23

Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? 17 But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, 18 and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness. 19 I am speaking in human terms, because of your natural limitations. For just as you once presented your members as slaves to impurity and to lawlessness leading to more lawlessness, so now present your members as slaves to righteousness leading to sanctification.

20 For when you were slaves of sin, you were free in regard to righteousness. 21 But what fruit were you getting at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed? For the end of those things is death. 22 But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life. 23 For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

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ii corinthians 4:16-18

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. 17 For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, 18 as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

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ii corinthians 5:7

for we walk by faith, not by sight.

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matthew 14:29-31

He said, "Come." So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, "Lord, save me." 31 Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, "O you of little faith, why did you doubt?"

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john 8:32

and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

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psalm 119:45

and I shall walk in a wide place, for I have sought your precepts.

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galatians 5:1

For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery.

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galatians 5:13

For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.

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my notes:

section 6

As Truth and Love are essential to genuine relationships and Truth and Love exist only in our Lord, we cannot acquire genuine relationship with others without a relationship with Jesus john 15:4-5, and you can only have a real relationship with Him if you live out His Truth with Love john 15:9-14, and it is in this very principle that is the way of genuine relationship i john 4:20-5:3 matthew 22:37-40 i samuel 20:17. So, genuine relationships will exist with those who have put Truth to Love-ing action for the sake of others i john 3:18. The Truth of genuine relationships is that to multiply your life in others you must follow Christ and persistently lay yourself down, God’s way, for others john 12:24 romans 2:7.

supporting scriptures

john 15:4-5

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5 I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.

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john 15:9-14

As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. 10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. 11 These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.

12 "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command you.

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i john 4:20-5:3

If anyone says, "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. 21 And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother.

1 Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. 2 By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. 3 For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome.

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matthew 22:37-40

And he said to him, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38 This is the great and first commandment. 39 And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. 40 On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets."

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i samuel 20:17

And Jonathan made David swear again by his love for him, for he loved him as he loved his own soul.

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i john 3:18

Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.

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john 12:24

Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.

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romans 2:7

to those who by patience in well-doing seek for glory and honor and immortality, he will give eternal life;

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